The night before is hard. And Mother’s Day morning. They’re the times when the rubbing it in feels the worst and I can't tell whether I'm going to celebrate Mother's Day or endure it. I don't suppose I hate Mother's Day. I know I said I did on the floor in the shower that morning. … Continue reading Another one down
Eleven years ago this happened
I was used to pregnancies ending early. At six or twelve weeks. And if they lasted longer than that, I was used to delivering early. At 18 weeks. Or at 24. So when Maeve was born after 40 weeks, big and round and full-term, I could hardly believe the size of her. She weighed eight … Continue reading Eleven years ago this happened
Letting go again
If it’s true that the death of a loved one tops the list of the five most stressful life experiences, then it must surely be followed in second place by sorting and emptying out that loved one’s wardrobe. Bathroom cupboard. Bedside table. Mum’s red glasses. Her toothbrush. Her slippers and dressing gown. The things that … Continue reading Letting go again
‘Thank you for your generous donation’
When Mum died I found great comfort in the quote that grief is love with no place to go. So true, I cried. ‘She’s still with you, mate,’ Anthony would say. What did he mean? She’s f&%#ing not though, is she? She’s in the ground. That’s what I wanted to say. But this week, I … Continue reading ‘Thank you for your generous donation’
An apple for the teacher
It was going swimmingly. Our first day. Actually it wasn't their first day of home learning; it was my first being home with them. Elsie was kneeling in front of the fire balancing her computer on her knees. Maeve had set herself up at the kitchen table. Perhaps tomorrow we could set up something a … Continue reading An apple for the teacher
It was a fun party after all
It feels a bit like musical chairs at a birthday party. All the kids run and squeal and when the music stops they plonk down on a chair and hold the seat of it with both hands, joy and pride clear on their safe little faces. And the one kid who misses out smiles weakly … Continue reading It was a fun party after all
Because my most recent posts have been so far from a highlight reel
I've never played in a sporting grand final. It might be that I wasn't picked for the team. It could be that I made myself unavailable for team sports in the later years of high school to avoid not getting picked. Or perhaps I was picked for the team, but my inability to throw a … Continue reading Because my most recent posts have been so far from a highlight reel
Raising awareness of suicide prevention
Sadly, we now know that Danny Frawley’s devastating death yesterday was not an accident. Frawley was respected for his willingness to share publicly his ongoing battle with depression. In a long list of great achievements, he is being remembered for using his profile to remove the stigma associated with depression. Today is World Suicide Prevention … Continue reading Raising awareness of suicide prevention
The first year
I woke this morning at the same time that Mum took her last breath 12 months ago. I remember every detail about that moment. In fact, I can recall, hour by hour, every detail of the two days leading up to it. Apparently, the cortisol released by our bodies in times of stress embeds memory … Continue reading The first year
