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Writing by Larissa Patton

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Grief

Expected and unexpected grief triggers

Posted on May 30, 2019 by Larissa

Dear Mum, I was just thinking back to this day last year when three of your girlfriends arrived at your house with morning tea, announcing that they hadn’t missed one of your birthdays yet.  I took candid photos of you all laughing so hard that each of you had to pull a tissue from your … Continue reading Expected and unexpected grief triggers

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Another first down

Posted on May 13, 2019May 13, 2019 by Larissa

Tough day at the office. Really tough. Mother’s Day started beautifully. I lay in bed listening to pancakes being made in the kitchen. Elsie and Maeve had brought in a colourful menu full of options and I ticked pancakes because kids like pancakes and I waited in bed because kids like serving breakfast in bed … Continue reading Another first down

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Perhaps it was a sign

Posted on March 4, 2019 by Larissa

We teach our kids not to wipe their runny noses on their sleeves. But if you’re at the cemetery visiting your mum’s grave to see the headstone for the first time and you don’t have a tissue, then it’s permitted. Would it be ‘her’ headstone instead of ‘the’ headstone? I would rather we were debating … Continue reading Perhaps it was a sign

Posted in Grief, On lifeTagged on life6 Comments

Here I am on Facebook

Here I am on Facebook

And on Instagram

Things just got real #crazycatlady #sorryunavailableforharvestnow #farmlife #thebearandthewhale
Truck Tetris - you win @sambocoloe #thebearandthewhale #oatenhay #farmlife
Some people were into Mick Thomas at the Beulah Pre-Harvest Festival. Not me though. #shouldvecheckedfirstifthisisthesamesongipostedlasttimeheplayedatbeulah #hedoesknowothersongs #thebearandthewhale
I’m cleaning up around the house in preparation for snake season, which has already started—the evidence of which has prompted this clean up. ‘See, this is why I hate gardening; this rake doesn’t even work properly,’ I mutter. (This is not a direct quote, more a clean summary.) My scrapes across the ground are violent, angry. I take off my sunglasses to wipe my brow. And I see that the rake has been upside down the whole time. #didyouknowthatrakesaredoublesided #andthatprescriptionsunniesdontalwayshelp #farmlife #thebearandthewhale
Blog update - Because my most recent posts have been so far from a highlight reel I’ve never played in a sporting grand final. It might be that I wasn’t picked for the team. It could be that I made myself unavailable for team sports in the later years of high school to avoid not getting picked. Or perhaps I was picked for the team, but my inability to throw a netball with any particular aim or distance, or catch said netball when it was pelted at me, meant that my team never actually made it to a final. In the last week or two, my social media feeds have been filled with photos of teams of players holding up their index fingers, photos of trophies and and cups and medals medals around necks and Best on Grounds. Last month our feeds were full of primary school kids dressed as their favourite book characters. Since I don’t have any grand final efforts to write about, I’ll have to take us back to Book Week. Because for some kids (this includes mine), Book Week is their time to shine. They’re reading and loving it, and along with schools and public libraries across the country, they get one day a year to have fun, to bring books to life and to celebrate all things literary, including Australian authors and illustrators. Books have the power to improve vocabulary, imagination, knowledge and connection. If we all read stories of difference and what it’s like to walk in another’s shoes, the world could be a different place. But if not, a book can allow us to escape into other worlds. And so books should be celebrated. I know that for some parents, Book Week is a pain in the neck. But in our house, the buildup and excitement is equivalent to Christmas. Here is a play showing how the last two Book Weeks have unfolded in our house. (Post continues in Comments)
Blog post - Raising awareness of suicide prevention Sadly, we now know that Danny Frawley’s devastating death yesterday was not an accident. Frawley was respected for his willingness to share publicly his ongoing battle with depression. In a long list of great achievements, he is being remembered for using his profile to remove the stigma associated with depression. Today is World Suicide Prevention Day. It’s about raising awareness of suicide prevention and, as Frawley did, encouraging conversations around mental illness. People say that if you don’t have depression, you don’t get it. That probably makes sense, because here’s something that surprised me — I struggle to understand it, even after my own depression. I can’t believe that, back then, I drew a line down the middle of a page but couldn’t write one thing on the side the page that I’d titled ‘Good things in my life’. I can’t understand how I wanted to drive my car into a tree. Not to end my life, but to end the numbness. I wanted to feel something…anything. If I could crash my car into a tree and just break my leg, I’d feel the pain of a broken leg. That would be something. I’d no longer feel nothing. I can’t imagine that had the bottle of antibiotics in our medicine cupboard been full, I’d have taken them all. Not because I wanted to die. But because it would have made me sick, surely. And even feeling sick would be better than feeling nothing. What I can understand is that either action back then would have been considered an attempted suicide, By everyone. Except me. You don’t understand depression until you can’t stand your own presence in an empty room.’ B. Devine That quote may help a little to understand mental illness. Or maybe that’s just for me; it reminds me how I felt. Even if you find that you just can’t understand mental illness, please be aware of it. Choose your words wisely when talking about mental illness. We need to raise awareness, not stigma. And, as in all areas of life, please don’t judge what you don’t understand. (Post continues in Comments)

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